#B90X - DAY 54 - Good Design is Honest

b90x

#41

I would have to say my biggest one is self handicapping. I doubt myself or what I am capable of accomplishing. This actually can happen after overconfidence. Example being: I am working on a car and I have seen this issue before. It has all the signs and when I go to fix it, the problem still exist. It could be a more in depth issue that I have to now track and diagnose, but maybe everything is showing correct values. After trying to diagnose and spending say an hour on a car, I become uncertain about my actual diagnosing skills. Maybe I didn’t check something right, etc.

I do have some ignorance, sometimes I hear feedback I have already heard… but I should listen to see if someone has a different approach.

Denial of reality does happen to me, I don’t like to admit my faults.

Projection of persona is one I used to struggle with. Everyone wants to be liked, but more recently I could care less what people think.

Reducing desire is one that happens to me when I go in motivated then have a shitty day. I want to hit a bonus and talk about my R8 that I want and then something goes wrong with the smooth work flow and I get angry and waste time as It’s just making it harder to get to my goal, and I’ll say “I’m fine with my BMW…” as I think that I am destined to be stuck in that shithole.


#42

I had to get honest with myself and my health earlier this year. Not that I was about to die or anything but I know that I was not living the blockchain life and living up to my capabilities. So I changed and was completely transparent with my self. Man it feels good now. :muscle:


#43

How do I lye to myself? Well it depends, I lie about what I want, about what I’m capable or not capable of, about caring about things cause I’m suppose to, about how best to build my future, about how much I should be doing at once, about what tasks are most important to me. I have caught myself lying to myself so much over the years that I’m surprised my nose isn’t ten feet long.Been slowing cutting it out and being more and more honest and truthful with myself, because I can’t do anything for nobody if I’m not taken care of first…


#44

This question is always a hard one. This time I believe I am lying to myself on the amount of time to achieve my goals. However attaching a date to a goal is usually unproductive. If your transmitting doubt because of the deadline transmitting it won’t happen so it doesn’t. So screw the deadline. It’s happening either way.


#45

At times i can deny the actually reality of something and i can sometimes self handicap myself and show doubt in my abilities to achieve something. At the time it may seem a safer option to down play something rather than being true to yourself. After watching today’s video i will be more conscious of lying to myself and will be more aware of staying true to myself.


#46

I really struggle with the self-handicapping lie. After having a few spectacular crash-n-burn projects that were extremely hard and painful, its been hard for me to get back in the driver seat per say because of my self doubt on my abilities and the fear of crashing-n-burning again.

Which has led to another lie, I think possibly the projection of a persona lie, that because I didn’t succeed or accomplish what I thought I should have and that I am a “failure”, I don’t have anything to contribute to help others and so I keep quiet about what I actually know. I’m working on this but it’s still very hard for me.

I think it’s because of these two lies that I hold myself back in showing or telling others what I’m working on and what I have accomplished which possibly leads to the lies of ignorance and refusing desire.

I can see how the refusing desire lie through these past few years of hardship and tragedy has caused mild depression for me that I’ve been battling. When you are in survivor mode and in a situation that you are forced to sacrifice just to survive, the refusing desire lie rears its ugly head.